Hi, I’m Stark. I am English, female, and a slate short. I have suffered with undiagnosed depression since I was about twelve or thirteen, and I’m now twenty four.
This blog was created so that I could finally write with completely no censorship about how I see the world- it was supposed to be a coping tool. I have already met some good people here, and I appreciate every like, follow or comment because it means that when I feel like the most awful person on the planet, I can see that someone understood me. Even just taking five minutes to read a bit of what I have written matters.
I don’t mind who you are, what you do for a living or where you come from, but thank you so much for stopping by. You are very kind to read the rantings of a crazed girl.
Brief outline of my life story:
I’m a professional ballet dancer. After the horrible stress of GCSEs, I left normal school and went to ballet school. I’d taken up with an abusive boyfriend- very sociopathic and manipulative. I had a breakdown at ballet school, ran away, and was kicked out for being crazy. The boyfriend did not support me in any way.
I spent two years at another ballet school, which was better. I managed to get a place in a ballet company that was attached to a school, which was great, although I still had my bouts of depression, and I was manipulated away from my family a lot.
When I graduated from there, I had no job for a year. I auditioned for ballet and contemporary companies, and got nowhere. My boyfriend practically lived with me, and the manipulation and abuse got worse. Very much worse.
I left him, finally, after nearly six years. Other sad things happened, and now I’m back in the depths again. I am desperate to get out.
I hope whatever you read here helps and doesn’t trigger or hinder you. I am going to try and post something more positive when I feel that way.
Thank you for reading.