Updated: surgery postponed.

I was supposed to be having my laparoscopy today. It was rescheduled for MAY. 22nd of May is when I’ll be in theatre.

I’ve just about stopped bleeding although exercise sets it off, and I’m dealing with the worst bout of depression I’ve had since I started this blog. I’m still in pain and I’m losing hope.

I have a doctor’s appointment on Wednesday and I’m frightened. I’m going to have to ask for help with my mental health again and I’m desperate not to, but I have no choice. Suicidal thoughts have been creeping back in and Clara is upset, frightened, and clingy.

We had a low blood sugar attack yesterday, and we’re still recovering. There’s been something found on our left eye that might be a scar left from diabetes (which, ofc, we’ve never been checked for) and that’s something else to wrestle with. We’re worried it might be that we’ve got the scar from the time we got really ill in December, when we couldn’t speak or open our eyes and couldn’t move our right side…

There’s too much going on, everything hurts, and we are dreading Wednesday.