More on my stupid comedown.

Today I woke exhausted despite sleeping well, nervous and anxious despite nothing happening, and apathetic despite the fact there are good people to care for me. I’m really struggling with food, and I don’t want to leave the house.

 

The problem with keeping on trying to function whilst feeling like this is it wrecks you slowly. You struggle to concentrate. You have the attention span of a flea. You’re tired all the time… And you have just stopped being manic, you all you can do is feel inadequate because a week ago you were buzzing, able to do anything at all. Now you’re just crawling through life and death seems a pleasant rest.

Suicidal thoughts are partly a warning and partly because I just want a break from life. I am so glad that next week is half term. I can just flop and I don’t have to feel guilty. No obligations. I can just sleep.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s