After that comment…

This morning, I don’t want to get out of bed. I panicked really badly last night- after the initial numbing shock, the anxiety clawed its way up my throat and tears flooded my eyes. I couldn’t believe it. I thought I was safe.

However, instead of keeping it to myself, I told my friend H, my friend R, J and another friend of mine I’ve known since childhood. I’ll call her Constance, because she’s been there every time I needed her. After ten minutes of believing the male and female voices of the dark passenger, I suddenly started getting messages back from my friends. I started crying again. Fear enveloped me and I asked, not for the first time and definitely not the last, why he has to keep tracking and following me.

J thought it was a troll, and my friend R thought so too. However, R was still not about to rule out the possibility that it was him. H was her usual supportive self- she’s feeling much better now and GOD, I’ve missed her- and Constance was furious with him/whoever posted that comment for me. All of the four told me to keep writing in my blog, so that’s exactly what I’m going to do.

Here’s a little message for whoever left that comment: Really? You think you have the right to judge me like that? Grow up and learn about what abuse does to someone, then go and help someone who’s been abused. Chances are, someone close to you will have suffered the same as me, unfortunately, because the statistics say so. Use your words with consideration before opening your mouth- that’s what does damage.

If it was him- good luck intimidating me like you used to. You may have made me feel depressed as hell last night, but I don’t think there’s any reason for you to attempt to control me anymore. Please shuffle off under the rock you came from and leave me the hell alone.

Thank you to the four people who pulled me through last night, I couldn’t have done it without you. X

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